In October I sent my manuscript Olivia’s life to quite some publishers. Not that many yet, I first wanted to see how it’s being received. October slowly changed in November and I didn’t focus too much on my previous book. It was impossible because of the writing challenge of this month. Then last week I received another rejection letter. This time with a full explanation why it wouldn’t work out. They enjoyed reading bits of it but my story is focused on just a slice of Olivia’s life and not digging deeper into her thoughts and feelings. I thought I actually have this in the blog posts of Olivia but that’s not enough.
It’s difficult. On one hand I’m grateful for this feedback because now I can try to change the story so it will be improved. On the other hand it creates this stream of doubts. What if it’s really not good enough? What if I can’t write at all? Especially the last question hurts the most. It’s something you’ve been doing your entire life and then by one response you think you’re not worth it. Nobody will read your books because clearly you can’t write. Is this how everyone feels after a rejection? I mean nobody can be happy after one, that’s for sure, but the endless thoughts of not being able to write your books because no one wants to publish it. Self doubt is a horrible thing and we shouldn’t take part in this. However, I guess it’s just something natural. It makes us humans and it kind of makes us humble.
Now you’re probably wondering… what am I going to do? Right now
besides feeling sad for myself I’m going to continue the two stories I had in mind. Arabella for NaNoWriMo and a psychological thriller. Then after these two I will take a look at Olivia’s life, change it, and find more publishers. Just because there are rejections doesn’t mean I’m going to give up. So that’s it for now. On the road of publishing there will be lots of rocks, u-turns, and traffic jam. But none of it will be able to stop you. At the end you will reach your destiny.